Brian D. Perskin & Associates

Dealing with your Divorce during the Holidays

If you are in the middle of a divorce as the holidays approach, you can expect some changes to your traditions. Things won't be like they were last year. You might not be able to be with the same people on Christmas, and you may be short on cash. But the holidays can still be salvaged. Take a look at how you can try to improve your mood as the holidays approach.

Be Prepared for the Changes

There may be some details that you never realized would change after divorce. Things you took for granted might not be there this year, but preparing yourself for the change can smooth the transition. For example, you probably won't feel comfortable going to your in-laws' house for Christmas this year, so you should plan to either stay home or go elsewhere for the holiday.

If you have children, you may have to split your time with them, meaning you might not be with them during the entire holiday season. This means you need to make the most of the time you do have with them. Then prepare to keep busy when they go to your ex's house.

Many people who are newly divorced are short on cash, and your friends and family will hopefully keep this in mind during the holidays. If you cannot afford to buy gifts for all your family members, you can propose that you each buy one present for a child and one for an adult in the family. Other relatives who have little money will also appreciate this suggestion. You can also make gifts or stick to buying gift cards that can buy $10 or $15 worth of music, video rentals, or coffee since this amount can go a long way on such items. Of course, you likely won't be expected to buy presents for your ex's family, which may lighten your load financially.

Make New Traditions

If your old traditions make you feel nostalgic or sad, you should work on creating new ones. Of course, if your children want to continue the traditions they grew up with, you can modify them with a new spin when possible. Either way, as you make new memories, the old ones may not sting so much. Every year you continue your new traditions, you should start to feel more upbeat about the holidays.

In addition, make a list of things you have always wanted to do around the holidays but couldn't because your ex didn't want to. For example, if you always wanted to go to the movies on Christmas and eat prime rib instead of the traditional ham, now you can do just that. Celebrate the freedom you have instead of mourning the past.

If legal trouble is adding to your worries about the holidays, contact Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. Whether your ex has threatened you or is not paying child support, we are here to help you get what you need. Call today for advice.

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