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Are You Staying Together for the Kids?

Divorce is scary. It’s an upheaval. The fear of the unknown can often prevent couples from taking those crucial first steps. Many parents will forego filing for a divorce, believing that staying married is the best option for their children. Contrary to popular belief, staying together for the kids isn’t always the right answer.

There are many different reasons why people choose to file for a divorce. These reasons are as unique and individual as marriages themselves. Common reasons for divorce often include:

  • Financial issues
  • Infidelity
  • Disagreements regarding child rearing
  • Falling out of love
  • Abuse (physical, emotional, or mental)

Parents often struggle with whether or not to divorce, because they are worried about how their decision will impact their kids. In situations that involve domestic violence or abuse, staying married will actually do more harm than good.

Children that are raised in abusive households tend to carry those behaviors into their adulthood. In order to help break the cycle of abuse, parents must remove themselves from these environments. Staying together for the kids is not recommended.

According to Psychology Today, many parents don’t think that their kids know that anything is wrong with their marriage. This is alarming. Children are perceptive, and notice more than we give them credit for. They can tell if their parents are unhappy or constantly at odds, and they will think this is normal. Children who are raised in this kind of environment do not have an example of what a happy and healthy relationship looks like.

Every child reacts to the news of their parent’s divorce differently. Some children feel a sense of relief, while others feel anxious and scared. It is important that parents take time to address their children’s concerns and remind them that they are loved.

Some kids have a very difficult time dealing with their parent’s divorce, and in situations like these, child therapy is helpful. A licensed therapist can help children process their emotions, develop coping strategies, and provide a general safe space.

Don’t let the fear of the unknown prevent you from filing for a divorce. The decision is a tough one, but the right law firm can help make the process easier. At Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C., we specialize in contested divorce and child custody cases. Our team of experienced attorneys create customized divorce strategies, each tailored to our client’s specific needs.

For more information, or to schedule a free consultation, call us at 718-875-7584 today!

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