Going through a divorce can be hard on its own, but when children are involved, the process can be even tougher. This is especially true for many fathers since most people assume they do not have as many rights as mothers do. However, if you are a father going through divorce, know that you have just as much right to see your kids as their mother does. Get an idea of your rights as a father during divorce.
Keep Up with the Regular Routine
Just because you or your wife have decided to divorce does not mean you are stripped of your parenting duties. Until there is a court order that requests a change in your routine, you can continue to see your children. This means you should attend their school functions, including plays, choir concerts, and sporting events. Even when they do not have any events you can watch, you should get in as much time with them as possible while there are no restrictions. Spend time with them after school, whether you go out to do something or simply watch a movie at home. Your children will appreciate the attention from their father, which may help them deal with the divorce better.
If your wife plans to get full custody, you can expect her to try to alienate the children. She may try to keep them away from you, or even tell them untrue details just so they want to stay with her. Fortunately, she cannot keep you away from your children until she gets a court order, which usually requires proof that you may hurt the kids. This means that most fathers have every right to continue their normal routine with their children, which may include giving them a ride to and from school, making them dinner, or generally spending quality time with them.
Don't Tell the Kids Divorce Details
Once you do have time with your kids, it may be tempting to let them know that their mother is trying to keep them from you. However, doing so is not recommended since this will put them in the middle, especially if their mother has said negative things about you, too. It may make them feel so uncomfortable that they might try to avoid spending time with you. If you are going for joint or full custody, you could end up hurting your chances of success if your children mention to anyone that you consistently tell them negative things about their mother.
The main thing to remember is that you have rights during divorce. You are encouraged to avoid letting your ex-wife keep you from your children. Instead, keep up your regular routine with them, and focus on just being the best father you can be. Focusing on your ex-wife and the negativity she brings into the picture will only end up hurting both you and your children.
If you want to make sure you have the best chance of continuing to see your kids after divorce, you need the help of a divorce lawyer who has represented plenty of fathers. Call Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. if you want to discuss your options as a father getting a divorce.