Brian D. Perskin & Associates

The Benefits of Separating Before Divorce

Studies have shown that separation tends to lead to a smoother divorce process. Not surprisingly, it has some benefits that should not be ignored. This is why you should consider separating for a period of time prior to getting divorced.

You Can Get Used to Being Without Your Spouse

One of the most important aspects of separating before divorce is that you can get used to the idea of living away from your spouse. You can use this time alone to realize how it will be to pay your bills on your own. If you have children and have custody most of the time, this will be a big change you will need to get used to. In addition, the separation period will be a good time to test out your communication skills with your spouse during a tough time. If you can get along during separation, you should be able to continue the friendly relationship throughout the divorce.

You Can Get Counseling

Another reason separation may be good before divorce is that it is an ideal time to get counseling. Talking to a professional may help you work through any issues you have noticed throughout the separation process. Maybe you have noticed you are not confident of what you can add to a relationship after realizing your marriage is not working out. Perhaps you have come to the conclusion that you always have to be in control, or you expect too much of people, which may have contributed to the separation. Learning these things about yourself, and finding out how to fix them, can help you in your next relationship. The separation period is the perfect time to work on any issues.

You Can Work on the Marriage

A small percentage of couples realize they do not want to go through with divorce after the separation period. While you should not go through this time expecting to reconcile, it may happen anyway. You might realize that being without your spouse is not what you want after all. If he or she also realizes this, you might want to give the marriage another try. It is better for this to happen during separation than after divorce.

If you are interested in any of these possible benefits, you should consider separation instead of divorce, at least at first. This may be just what you need in order to realize whether divorce is the answer or not. You may be surprised by what you find. If you still end up getting divorced after the separation period, you will at least be used to the idea of living without your spouse. You will need some extra confidence and sense of independence to get through the process of divorce, and separation just might offer that.