Brian D. Perskin & Associates

Social Media: Friend or Foe during Divorce?

Is Social Media Bad for your Divorce?

Social media; you either love it or you hate it. But regardless of your personal opinions on the matter, social media will have a major effect on your divorce case.  How you handle your individual accounts will help to determine if  social media will be your friend, or foe, during divorce.

Social Profiles Spell Disaster for Marriages

Believe it or not, researchers have found that social media use can lead to divorce. In a study conducted by universities in Boston and Chile, researchers found that there is a direct correlation between social networking use and marriage quality.

Scientific Study Proves Social Media Can Lead to Divorce
Scientific Study Proves Social Media Can Lead to Divorce

The amount of time spent on social media isn’t the only reason why the platforms may spell disaster for your relationship. Sites like Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Snapchat can be a catalyst for infidelity and jealousy. The temptation to have an affair can be strong if your marriage is already strained, and these platforms make it easier to stray.

Social Media and Hidden Assets

Social media is changing the legal landscape. In addition to being cited as a reason why couples file for divorce, it can also be used as evidence during your case. This rings especially true if one spouse suspects that their ex is hiding marital assets.

Hidden assets often surface during the discovery phase of divorce. Most users won’t list their income in their profiles, but they will post photos of vacations or expensive purchases. These photos will be used as evidence of additional assets, which usually results in a higher net worth. And, of course, a higher net worth impacts every aspect of divorce, especially child support and equitable distribution.

Successfully proving that assets are being hidden or squandered away is not easy, and requires the expertise of a seasoned divorce attorney. Luckily, we have experience successfully uncovering hidden assets by auditing an opposing party’s personal and business networking accounts.

Tips for Using Social Media

It’s hard to avoid social media all together, even during heated divorce actions. How can you play it smart, while still keeping an active social media presence?

  1. Double check your privacy settings- make sure your profiles are friends only.
  2. Change your passwords, so your ex won’t be able to log into your accounts.
  3. Avoid posting pictures or updates that your ex can use to make a judge think you are a bad parent.
  4. Never cyber stalk your ex, their new partner, or family members.
  5. Remember: the internet is permanent. Use common sense. If you have to second guess whether or not you should post, don’t do it.

We know that social media plays a prominent role in your day-to-day life, but that doesn’t mean it needs to negatively impact on your divorce. Be smart about your online presence during the course of your action, and hire an attorney to handle the rest of the case for you.

Social media is a very powerful tool, which can be helpful if harnessed correctly. For more information on divorce in New York, contact Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. today!

Are You Staying Together for the Kids?

Staying together for the kids

Divorce is scary. It’s an upheaval. The fear of the unknown can often prevent couples from taking those crucial first steps. Many parents will forego filing for a divorce, believing that staying married is the best option for their children. Contrary to popular belief, staying together for the kids isn’t always the right answer.

Reasons for Wanting a Divorce

There are many different reasons why people choose to file for a divorce. These reasons are as unique and individual as marriages themselves. Common reasons for divorce often include:

  • Financial issues
  • Infidelity
  • Disagreements regarding child rearing
  • Falling out of love
  • Abuse (physical, emotional, or mental)

Staying Together Normalizes Negative Behavior

Parents often struggle with whether or not to divorce, because they are worried about how their decision will impact their kids. In situations that involve domestic violence or abuse, staying married will actually do more harm than good.

Children that are raised in abusive households tend to carry those behaviors into their adulthood. In order to help break the cycle of abuse, parents must remove themselves from these environments. Staying together for the kids is not recommended.

According to Psychology Today, many parents don’t think that their kids know that anything is wrong with their marriage. This is alarming. Children are perceptive, and notice more than we give them credit for. They can tell if their parents are unhappy or constantly at odds, and they will think this is normal. Children who are raised in this kind of environment do not have an example of what a happy and healthy relationship looks like.

Get Help for Your Kids

Every child reacts to the news of their parent’s divorce differently. Some children feel a sense of relief, while others feel anxious and scared. It is important that parents take time to address their children’s concerns and remind them that they are loved.

Some kids have a very difficult time dealing with their parent’s divorce, and in situations like these, child therapy is helpful. A licensed therapist can help children process their emotions, develop coping strategies, and provide a general safe space.

NYC Divorce Powerhouse

Don’t let the fear of the unknown prevent you from filing for a divorce. The decision is a tough one, but the right law firm can help make the process easier. At Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C., we specialize in contested divorce and child custody cases. Our team of experienced attorneys create customized divorce strategies, each tailored to our client’s specific needs.

For more information, or to schedule a free consultation, call us at 718-875-7584 today!

Divorce News: Can Science Predict Who Will Get Divorced?

Can science predict if you will get a divorce?

It’s impossible to tell which couples head to divorce court after walking down the aisle. There are the obvious reasons for divorce, such as infidelity and financial issues, but social scientists wanted to find out who is most likely to file.

Business Insider reviewed marriage and divorce studies, and compiled the top traits that may indicate a separation is on the horizon. These are the most surprising:

Your Age Matters

When it comes to whether or not your marriage will stand the test of time, your age matters. Studies show that couples who tie the knot in their teens, or after their mid-30s, are more likely to get a divorce. In fact, the likelihood of divorce increases by 5% each year, starting at the age of 32. (This is according research by University of Utah professor Nicholas Wolfinger.)

Lack of Education

A lack of education could lead to divorce, according to the National Longitudinal Survey of Youth in 1979. The study reveals that couples who did not complete high school, or go to college, had a higher divorce rate.

While this study is dated, it still rings true. Lower levels of education can result in a lower earning potential, which can cause stress and marital strain.

Husbands Who Don’t Work

A surprising reason why couples may be driven to divorce lies in each person’s employment status. Harvard University conducted a study, and found that couples are more likely to separate if the husband doesn’t work full-time. Researcher Alexandra Killewald reviewed marriages that started after 1975, and learned that these marriages had a 3.3% chance of ending in divorce after one year. The wives’ employment status didn’t have much of an affect.

How You Interact and Fight

How you interact with your spouse may determine whether or not you will get divorced. All couples argue, but not all arguing styles are effective or healthy. Withdrawing and giving the silent treatment leads to a higher rate of divorce, because it shows that people are less happy in their marriage. Berating or undermining your spouse can lead to feelings of contempt and resentment.

Being Too Affectionate

Are you super affectionate with your spouse? If so, this may be a red flag. Psychologist Ted Huston conducted a 13-yearlong study, where he followed 168 couples, starting on their wedding day. He found that the couples who filed for divorce after 7 years, were the ones who were overly affectionate at the beginning of their marriage.

Aviva Patz published an article in Psychology Today, dissecting Dr. Huston’s study. She states, “[C]ouples whose marriages begin in romantic bliss are particularly divorce-prone because such intensity is too hard to maintain. Believe it or not, marriages that start out with less ‘Hollywood romance’ usually have more promising futures.”

If you’re headed for Divorce…

There is no surefire way to know whether or not your marriage will end in divorce. But, if you find yourself on the brink of separation, you need to hire an attorney.

The law firm of Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. specializes in complex divorce and family law matters. We take a unique approach to representation, crafting personalized divorce strategies to help our clients succeed in court. For more information, or to schedule a free consultation, call us at 718-875-7584 today!

Rules for Divorce in New York

Rules for divorce

Last week, we provided insider tips for what you should know before you file for divorce. While that information is great, your divorce cases involves much more. In fact, there are rules for divorce that you must follow to help guarantee a successful case.

What are the top 4 rules for divorce, and how can they help you?

Always Hire an Attorney

The #1 rule for divorce is that you should always hire an attorney. Divorce and family court cases are very complex matters, and require the attention of an experienced attorney. Even if your case is uncontested, you will still benefit from hiring a lawyer.

Divorce lawyers specialize in matrimonial and family law, and are familiar with the intricacies of the system. Your attorney should be an expert in this very niche kind of law, so be wary of general practitioners. A family law attorney can help you build a winning divorce strategy, and keep your family and assets intact.

Obey All Court Orders

One of the most important rules for divorce involves court orders. You will have many court orders throughout your case, including ones for child custody, visitation, and spousal support. You may even have an Order of Protection.

You must follow a court order, regardless of whether or not you agree with it. Failing to abide by the terms listed in an order can land you in serious trouble. In extreme cases, you will be found to be in contempt of court, and serve jail time. Remember: it is easier to ask the court to modify an order, than it is to explain to a judge why you intentionally disobeyed one.

Put Your Kids First

Imagine how hard it is for you to cope with your divorce. Now, multiply that by ten. That’s how difficult it is for your kids. It is imperative that both parents work together to make the situation easier and less stressful for your children. How can you do this?

  • Learn how to co-parent during divorce
  • Encourage your kids to ask questions
  • Avoid talking badly about your ex
  • Create consistency between households
  • Consider the benefits of child therapy during divorce

Take Time to Focus on Yourself

The divorce process is stressful, overwhelming, and can feel never-ending. This is why one of the rules for divorce is to focus on yourself. Taking time to relax and recharge can make a huge difference. De-stressing during the most difficult times of your case can help you clear your head, and focus on the matter at hand. Many people find that writing in a divorce journal is therapeutic, while others prefer to hit the gym, see friends, or practice a hobby. Whatever you do, make sure you enjoy it. This is your time!

 

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Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. is a New York City based divorce and family law firm. Their team of dedicated attorneys specialize in complex divorce cases, and represent clients in all five boroughs. For more information, or to schedule your free consultation, call 718-875-7584 today!

7 Things to Know Before You File for Divorce

7 Things to Know Before You File for Divorce

Filing for a divorce is a major undertaking. Your case will likely have many twists and turns, and you will face roadblocks before you’re officially divorced. How can you prepare for these challenges, and what are the top things you should know before you file for divorce?

1. Know What Kind of Case You Have

This may sound obvious, but you need to know what kind of divorce you have before you file. Is your divorce contested, or uncontested? Will child custody be an issue? What about marital assets?

The type of divorce you have will determine how your case plays out. Uncontested cases are resolved easily and quickly, whereas contested matters are longer and more complex.

2. Hire an Attorney before You File

Divorce is one of the biggest battles you will ever face, and you need to be prepared. Hiring an experienced divorce and family law attorney is the best way to do this. Attorneys are a dime a dozen, and some are more qualified than others. Make sure you consult with 3 to 4 lawyers before making your final selection.

3. Know the Truth about Divorce

The unfortunate truth about divorce is that it is unpredictable. Working with an attorney to create a winning divorce strategy is great, but it isn’t full proof. Things will happen during your divorce that can throw a wrench in your plans. Keep an open mind, and trust that your lawyer is working to get your case back on track.

4. No Two Cases are Alike

Each and every divorce case is different. These are very personal matters, and the details of your case will depend on many different factors. The length of your marriage, the amount of assets, and whether or not you have children, all have an impact.

We encourage all of our clients to turn to friends and family members for emotional support during their divorce. With that being said, be cautious when it comes to taking their advice. It is likely you know someone who has gone through a divorce, and they may be willing to pass on words of wisdom. Just remember that their case is different than yours, and what worked for them may not be best for you.

5. You Won’t Be Divorced in a Month

The timeline for a divorce in New York varies. An uncontested divorce can take anywhere between 4 to 6 months to be signed by a judge, after all papers are submitted. Contested cases have been known to last years.

New York State does process expedited divorce cases, however, you must meet special requirements in order to get one. Some of the most common reasons people apply for an expedited divorce include military service, pregnancy, and issues surrounding immigration. Meet with an attorney before you file to determine if you can get an expedited divorce.

6. Co-Parenting Takes a Lot of Work

One of the hardest parts of divorce is co-parenting. Learning how to co-parent with your ex takes a lot of work, and doesn’t always come naturally. Figuring out successful co-parenting strategy involves trial and error, but it is worth it.

There are a lot of methods and tools to help make the co-parenting transition easier. You can try alternative forms of co-parenting, like parallel parenting. Depending on the kind of relationship you have with your ex, you may even decide to live together after divorce.

7. You Will Lose Friends

Divorce is an upheaval. It has the possibility to shake the foundation of your life. It is not uncommon for parties to lose the support system of their friends and in-laws. Your friends will feel forced to take sides, or they may even walk away altogether.

As disheartening as this reality is, it does have a silver lining. Divorce allows you to see who your true friends are, and opens you up to having new experiences and meeting new people. It’s sad to lose so many people you care about as a result of your divorce, but you’ll get through it.

 

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Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. is a New York City based divorce and family law firm. Their team of dedicated attorneys specialize in complex divorce cases, and represent clients in all five boroughs. For more information, or to schedule your free consultation, call 718-875-7584 today!

Financial Pitfalls during Divorce

How to avoid financial pitfalls during divorce

Last week, we let you in on a little secret: there are hidden financial benefits to divorce. Unfortunately, there are drawbacks, as well. What are the most common financial pitfalls you may face during your divorce, and how can you avoid them?

Paying Your Retainer Fee

The first financial pitfalls of divorce begin as soon as you hire an attorney. Most divorce lawyers require you to pay a retainer fee, which can costs thousands of dollars. The initial cost of a divorce should not dissuade you from filing.

There are a few different ways you can prepare for the financial burden of a retainer fee. If you know a divorce is imminent, but you are not ready to file, you can save money to pay your retainer. Some litigants borrow money from family members, while others choose to finance their divorce with Flexxbuy.

Discovery Costs

The discovery phase of divorce can drain your bank account, unless you get proactive early. Gathering financial documents now, will prevent your attorney from scrambling to send subpoenas to institutions and companies during the middle of your case.

Failing to comply with your ex’s discovery demands will lead to additional court appearances. These court appearances, along with extensive motion practice, are major financial pitfalls during divorce. Save yourself time, and money, and use our free Financial Checklist to start keeping track of your documents.

Tax Implications

While there is a chance your divorce may benefit your taxes, you need to be aware of any financial pitfalls when you file. Your filing status, exemptions, and deductions will change. You are not allowed to deduct child support payments on your taxes, but you can do so with alimony payments.

Understanding exactly how your divorce will affect your taxes will help you avoid the confusing financial pitfall. Discuss your options with your attorney prior to settling, and always have a certified professional file your taxes on your behalf.

Letting Your Emotions Win

Letting your emotions get the best of you is one of the most common financial pitfalls of divorce. You can do serious damage to your case when you let anger, resentment, and hurt cloud your judgment.

Divorce can be emotionally traumatic, but it is best to treat your case like a business process. Be pragmatic, listen to your attorney’s advice, and check your emotions at the door. Never fight with your ex out of revenge, and keep the big picture in mind throughout your case. The sooner you learn to stop being emotional, the sooner your divorce can be finalized.

Dealing with Financial Pitfalls

Regardless of the steps you take, you will most likely experience one of the many financial pitfalls to divorce. You can help minimize the impact of your divorce by hiring an experienced family law attorney.

At Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C., we understand that each divorce is unique. This is why we create personalized representation plans for every client. Your divorce is one of the hardest things you will ever go through, but the right attorney can make it a little easier.

For more information on divorce and family law in New York City, contact a member of our team at 718-875-7584. Or, visit us on vCita to schedule a free, no obligation consultation today!

Top 5 Reasons You May Get Divorced

op 5 Reasons You'll Get Divorced

Statistics show that nearly half of all marriages end in divorce. Why is this? Are small habits and annoyances to blame, or is it something big that causes couples to get divorced? While the exact cause for divorce varies, here, we discuss the Top 5 reasons couples call it quits:

Financial Issues

Money impacts every part of your life, especially your marriage. Issues surrounding income, marital debt, and spending habits, can cause major headaches. A strong marriage needs to have a solid foundation, and having the same money goals as your spouse is a crucial part of that foundation.

Infidelity

It should come as no surprise that infidelity is a common reason why couples get divorced. Extramarital affairs put a lot of stress on a relationship, and destroy the trust couples have for each other. Divorce papers often follow an affair.

Lack of Communication

Not being able to communicate well with your spouse can lead to divorce. Constant disagreements and bickering can lead to miscommunication- or a breakdown of communication all together. This can create a lot of tension in your relationship.

Addictive Behaviors

Addiction often results divorce, and we’re not just talking about substance abuse problems. Addiction can manifest in a variety of ways, including in your work, and in your desire to maintain a certain image or lifestyle. Some addictions are so strong that they become the focal point of your relationship, and will lead to divorce.

Incompatibility

Sometimes, regardless of how much your love your spouse, the two of you just aren’t compatible. While this is unfortunate, it is common. Differences surround religion, the desire to start a family, or where you want to live, can result in a marital breakdown. Getting divorced because of incompatibility doesn’t mean you don’t love your spouse. It just means that the two of you care enough about the other to let them have a chance at true happiness.

Are You Getting Divorced?

Hiring a family law attorney to represent you during a divorce is always recommended. Retaining a lawyer has tremendous benefits, regardless of the reason why you want to file for divorce. Because of how complicated the process is, and it is far too risky to try to represent yourself.

The law firm of Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. has helped thousands of New Yorkers navigate their divorce and family law cases. We strongly believe that knowledge is power, especially when it comes to divorce. This is why our attorneys off free, no obligation, consultations for all NYC residents. Call us at 718-875-7584 to speak to one of our dedicated professionals today!

We’ve Been Nominated for Best of Brooklyn!

Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. is proud to announce their nomination as Best Divorce Law Firm in Brooklyn. The Best of Brooklyn competition, hosted by Dime Community Bank, aims to shed a spotlight on the best businesses in the Borough.

Voting for the Best of Brooklyn

Casting your vote for the Best in Brooklyn competition is simple. Just follow these 4 quick steps to vote for Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C.:

  1. Visit bestofbk.com from your computer or mobile device
  2. Click “Vote Now” on the top of the webpage
  3. Under “Categories”, select “Services” and scroll down till you see “Divorce Lawyer” (We’re right on top!)
  4. Click the red “Vote” button, and finish by entering your email address

Voting for the Best of Brooklyn awards ends on September 30th. Don’t forget to check back daily to make sure your vote is counted!

Why is this Important?

The Best of Brooklyn competition lets locals show their love for their favorite restaurants, galleries, and other small businesses. Brooklynites (like you) take great pride in their Borough, and the wealth of services it provides.

The Best of Brooklyn winners are the crème de la crème that Brooklyn has to offer. Don’t you want the best representation for your divorce or family court matter? Don’t settle for a subpar attorney or a mediocre law firm.

Brooklyn’s Best Law Firm

The attorneys at Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. have represented thousands of New Yorkers in tough divorce and family law matters. For more information, or to schedule a free, no-obligation consultation, contact Brian and his team at 718-875-7584 today!

Introducing Legal Financing with Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C.

divorce funding

At Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C., we are sensitive to the fact that divorce and family law cases can be expensive. We encourage our clients to take measures to keep their legal fees low, but sometimes, that isn’t enough. This is why we are proud to announce that our firm now offers legal financing to all New Yorkers.

What is Legal Financing?

There are many benefits to using legal financing to fund your divorce or family law case:

  • Pay your retainer fee without draining your bank account
  • Keep up to date with future legal bills
  • Have a less stressful case, without having to worry about money

The Legal Financing Process

We have partnered with FlexxBuy LLC to make applying for legal funding fast, easy, and stress free. Just answer a few short questions, and within seconds, you will have a list of financing packages that best suit your needs.

You are able to request legal funding in any amount, ranging from $1,000.00 to $40,000.00. Applying for funding with us will not impact your credit score, and there is no obligation to choose a financing package.

You don’t need to worry about scrambling to pay back your financing loan, either. Depending on the type of financing package you select, you will have between 12 months to 4 or 5 years to pay back your loan.

Apply Now!

Divorce is stressful enough without having to worry about how you will pay your legal bills. Click here to apply for legal financing with Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C..

For more information on divorce and family law in New York City, contact us at 718-875-7584 to schedule a free consultation today!

Common Divorce Myths in New York

divorce myths

The internet is a wonderful tool, but it can be harmful to your divorce or child custody case. There are countless divorce horror stories online, and it’s hard to not believe them. Luckily, the team at Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. have shed a light on the most common New York divorce myths out there.

Myth #1: You must file for divorce in the city/state you got

married.

This is not true. Where you file for divorce depends on where you, or your spouse, legally reside. So, just because you got married in Las Vegas, doesn’t mean you must file for divorce in Nevada. Check out New York’s residency requirements for more information.

Myth #2: You cannot get a divorce if your spouse doesn’t

consent to one.

This is one of the biggest divorce myths. New York has two types divorce: contested, and uncontested. Contested divorces occur when one party does not consent to the divorce, or they don’t agree with the terms listed in the Complaint.

A Judge will never force you to stay married if your spouse doesn’t want a divorce. Contested divorce cases take more time than their uncontested counterparts, but a divorce will be granted. Just remain patient and let your attorney handle the matter for you.

Myth #3: Mothers will always be granted child custody

because of court bias.

In New York, child custody is determined in the best interest of the child. This can mean either the mother or the father.

A Judge will issue a child custody order ff you and your ex are unable to reach an agreement on your own. The Judge will take many factors into consideration, including which parent was the primary caregiver prior to divorce, while making their final decision.

Myth #4: You will “lose” your divorce case if you commit

adultery.

New York is a “no-fault” divorce state, so Judges typically pay little attention to accusations of adultery. You are not entitled to a greater share of marital assets just because your spouse had an affair.

With that being said, alimony payments may be impacted if a Judge decides that a cheating spouse wastefully dissipated marital assets by spending a lot of money on his or her fling. It is recommended you hire an attorney to help you determine if this is true in your case.

Myth #5: All marital assets will be split 50/50.

New York divides marital assets equitably, not equally. This means that marital property cannot be split in equal halves between you and your ex.

Instead, the Court must take many factors into consideration while determining the equitable distribution of assets. Factors can include the length of your union, your income, and each spouse’s financial contribution to the marriage. The Court must also determine if an asset is sole property, joint property, or has been co-mingled during the marriage.

Myth 6: You don’t need a divorce lawyer.

One of the most concerning and harmful divorce myths is that you don’t need a lawyer. Divorce cases are complex matters. It is easy to get caught up in your emotions, and for your judgement to become clouded. This is why it is always recommended that you retain an experienced divorce attorney to advocate on your behalf.

The team of attorneys at Brian D. Perskin & Associates P.C. are experts in matrimonial and family law, having represented countless New Yorkers throughout some of the most difficult periods in their lives.

Find out how we can help you. Call us at 718-875-7582 to schedule a free, no obligation consultation today!